You know you are addicted to the Internet when…
You kiss your girlfriend's home page.
Your bookmark takes 15
minutes to scroll from top to bottom.
Your eyeglasses have a web site
burned in on them.
All your daydreaming is preoccupied with getting a
faster connection to the net: 28.8…ISDN…cable modem…T1…T3.
And
even your night dreams are in HTML.
You turn off your modem and get this
awful empty feeling, like you just pulled the plug on a loved one.
You
refer to going to the bathroom as downloading.
You start introducing
yourself as "Jim at I-I-Net dot net dot au
Your heart races faster and
beats irregularly each time you see a new WWW site address in print or on TV,
even though you've never had heart problems before.
You step out of your
room and realize that your parents have moved and you don't have a clue when it
happened.
You turn on your intercom when leaving the room so you can
hear if new e-mail arrives.
Your wife drapes a blond wig over your
monitor to remind you of what she looks like.
All of your friends have
an @ in their names.
When looking at a pageful of someone else's links,
you notice all of them are already highlighted in purple.